Hiiiiiii,

I haven’t updated in quite a while.So many exciting things happening!

Tomorrow, I am going to begin work with my personal trainer and I am SO excited. I think this is just what I need to lose the last 20-25 pounds I’ve been wanting to lose.

I bought my first ever bikini today. And yes, I mean ever. You don’t even know how big of a deal this is. I never ever ever ever thought I’d purchase one. Ever. Never ever. I’m going to use this as a motivation. My goal is to ditch this last twenty to get into it! Once I’m at my goal that’s the only thing I’m going to wear is bikinis, regardless of the weather or season. So be ready! (jkkk)

I’m also going to try to daily document my menu & exercise routine. That way I’m more accountable to myself & hopefully I can help someone in the process.

So here we go.. the Stephanie’s getting into a bikini this summer life plan:

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Be Happy!

…You all thought I was going to say weight loss - didn’t you ;).

This year my main resolution is to be happy with my progress. I’ve come really far. Trust me- I’ve felt every one of those 40 pounds. When I first started my weight loss journey in 2007, I remember walking up an incline on a treadmill was an intense work out. I had never really worked out before. Now I’m running 5k’s and a half an hour at the gym seems like I’m skipping out.

Last night I had a thin-ter-vention from both my boyfriend and Mom. They both looked at me like I was banana’s when I said I wanted to lose another thirty pounds. I’m taking today as a reflection of why I feel this way, and why I can’t be content with my progress. Why I can’t look in the mirror and think that it’s enough. I’m realizing it’s because I have always had in my head the notion of being the fat girl. From the time I hit middle school it’s been my obession (mainly due to the insesent teasing). It’s become a part of who I am. I went through my secondary schooling worrying about how I looked at formals, and how no one would want to talk to me because I was so fat. Being the fat girl losing weight has been my thing, and it’s time to start to let go. I’m going to continue to lose weight, but I’m making a pledge to let go of the fat girl in my head. I kind of feeling like I’m breaking up with an jerk boyfriend, I know I should let you go, fat mean girl in my head- but I can’t!

I know I’ve made progress. It’s come to the point where I look at photos and don’t recognize the girl from freshman year of college. My eating habits have dramatically changed. I’ve come to the point where it’s automatic to limit myself when endulging and my stomach has shrunk too. I can run! Who would’ve thought?! I love the healthy person I am now, and it’s part of my perfectionist, sometimes on the verge of OCD nature that I be the best that I can be. I can be a fit, healthy, calorie tracking girl while ditching the cray cray obsessive-ness.

I am enough and I think I can resolve at that.
xo Stephanie

woops.

..Tumblr-weed ever lately!

woops….i’m sorry!

This week began summer camp at my work and it’s safe to say it has been: exhausting. insane. and AWESOME all rolled into one.

I’ll update soon about diet. life. & fitness.

To all of my followers / friendly tumbler-weeds who have helped me out. I feel like lately I have been stress city and you all have been so kind with your responses! So thanks! :)

I’m almost done with my meal plan for next weeks start of P90x… I’m going to post them here to keep myself on track (love me some accountability!) and for anyone interested :)

I’m going out to buy my heart rate monitor tomorrow… any favorites?

p.s. who doesnt love some disney princess in their thank you’s?!

YES.

celestegivesup:

gettin-healthy:

ABSOLUTELY NO NO NO NO THINSPO. YOU DO NOT NEED TO BE LOSING WEIGHT, JUST PROMOTING A HEALTHY, FIT LIFESTYLE. BOTH MALES AND FEMALES. SPREAD THE WORD. SEND ME A MESSAGE, AND I WILL LET YOU KNOW IF YOU GET APPROVED.

http://fitblrdirectory.tumblr.com/

Hopefully I can find some new fitblrs to follow on here!

I’m going to start P90x Monday.

I really want to follow the diet… but it seems so overwhelming.
I don’t know what it is but I’m feeling discouraged by it.

I’m trying to prep a schedule this week, and prep food on Sunday so I can succeed.

Has anyone else out there done P90x and followed the diet as well?

Any tips for this newbie?

car broke down on major highway in bumper to bumper traffic.
car got fixed
went into the city
ate & drank with my best friends (alot.)

Now….

Stepped on the scale this morning and literally said I gained 5 pounds?

I know that this can’t be possible… because I didn’t over do it THAT much.. haha. And I don’t think it is possible to gain 5 pounds in 2 days…But could this be a mix between alcohol water weight & PCOS?

Anybody know?